After far too many people around and too much noise I needed a little bit of a time out last night. I guess others would call me an introvert, but true introverts would call me an extrovert. Much like this video talks about I would have to say that I’m more of an introvert. This TED talk explains it well about why I needed a timeout last night.
John saw this TED talk and it hit home to him. In his mind it described me. This is why I need a good run…. some music blaring in my earbuds… some time alone in my room. John likes to say well why don’t you just go shopping, take a trip to the coffee shop or do this this or this when you need to be alone. This is simply and easily answered by saying that I need the quiet of a room and some music- with or without a cup of hot tea or more likely a glass of wine. Other places are far too overwhelming. I need to be entirely alone and entirely in charge of the sounds that are around me. If I don’t have this shutdown moment I’m not a very happy person. I need this every day and if I don’t get it watch out because things like last night happen where I feel like I may lose my mind. My husband was gone for 4 nights in a row. To other people this may seem silly to complain about their husband being gone for four nights, but for me it means I didn’t get enough time to just myself in the quiet. It means Mommy NEEDS a timeout!
Dogs and cats are perfect examples. Our dogs for instance cannot get enough stimulation and our cat can’t wait to catch moments when all of the children and dogs will leave her alone in the quiet. She needs that peace for herself and it’s nothing wrong with her. She’s simply a cat and that’s how cats are for the most part. Our puppy Benson has to be around everyone and can’t wait to greet everyone at the door. If we have company and he’s in his kennel he whines and gets very upset almost yelping in his desire to be social.
I’ve started to notice our children’s personalities. My son is much like me. He likes to be alone in his imagination and inside his own head. He also enjoys being alone playing. He also enjoys a good bike ride. In social situations he begins to shut down almost shy as he hides behind us or acts crazy not sure how to behave in social situations. He’s perfectly fine playing in a room alone or watching a movie at a party. Our daughter would rather be up in the action socializing and playing with other folks. She doesn’t get herself wrapped up in the imaginative play and would rather run in circles playing. She is much like her father.
I realized at a social event the other day that I was far more interested in getting to know our friends’ dog than I was interested in getting to know the other folks there. It’s nothing personal against the other people. It is my social out- meeting new people and making fluff conversation isn’t my strong suit- I’d rather be real with someone. That’s why I’m better with people I already know and have an involved relationship with… I’m good at long conversations about real things- emotions- opinions. Chit – chatty crap and I aren’t good friends it’s awkward for me. This isn’t the first time I have gotten to know my friends’ pets over getting to know people around social situations. It’s just something I have recently realized about myself. One of my friends has a dog and a cat- they LOVE me. Her dog has bear hugged me- paws around my waist – when I walked in the door. Her cat once all the commotion has died down will find me and come curl up in my lap. There may be several other people around but her pets are by my side. It might be because I’m paying attention to them, but it’s more about me wanting to be in their world partially than it is just them wanting a nice rub on the head. I love animals of course, but I have to admit giving them a good belly rub is far more interesting to me than finding out what someone does for their 9 to 5.
So I was completely overstimulated like a baby. After having multiple nights with the kids- one night out shopping and eating at a restaurant… followed by wild and crazy kids at work yesterday… by the time it got to dinner I had no plans and was so exhausted. I just plopped myself on the kitchen floor and told John to figure it out, because I needed to be alone for a while. I came down for dinner to join them for dinner and he bathed the kids and put them in bed. I was in bed and asleep by 9:30. I was honestly exhausted from just being around too much. I so needed that timeout.
I awoke this morning in a great mood and refusing to leave the comfort of our bed. Too bad our kids and pets sabotaged my morning. That will have to be another blog post about allowing your surrounding to sabotage your good mood. I was totally guilty of that this morning.